Personal Information
Full Name: Lonna Allison Cottrell
D.O.B.: January 28th, 1973
Height: 5’5″
Weight: between Karen Carpenter and Alec Baldwin
Eye Color: hazel
Hair Color: currently auburn, original unknown
Did Your Mother Smoke During Her Pregnancy With You: Isn’t it obvious? Yes.
Number of Children: one
Number of Marriages: zero
Number of Divorces: zero
Number of Divorces Responsible for: unknown
Most Revered Literary Character: Hester Prynne
Allergies: mild reaction to adhesive, serious reactions to commitment and sports of any kind
Favorite Freudian Stage Of Development: oral
Least Favorite Freudian Stage of Development: anal
Number Of Boyfriends That Cheated On You At A Boy Scout Camp: one (that I’m aware of)
Surgical Procedures: root canal, C-section, sphincterotomy, fissurectomy
Celebrity Encounters: saw Andrew Wyeth eat a chicken sandwich, Damon Wayons at a club in Philly, and Kevin Bacon walk by at the Cosmopolitan…and Shirley Manson hit on me telepathically.
Movies That Made Me Love Icebergs: Titanic